is wine microwaveable?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
