Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
