We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out mid-signature
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize