sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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