so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
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He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
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