She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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