Your tits are I can't wait for
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
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