HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Randomize
