True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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