either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
