Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
