im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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