idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
