I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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