there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize