I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
