I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
... don't judge me
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.