they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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