i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize
