the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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