There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He felt like a one man threesome
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
These tits shall not be calmed
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
