i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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