hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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