Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
