Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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