they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
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