She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
