I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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