I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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