This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
