Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I still have a little drunk in my system
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
