So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
