im gay
i know
yea but for you.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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