question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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