so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
