absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
