Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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