You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize