CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
