we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
