she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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