You're so nebulous sometimes
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
