My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize