She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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