that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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