Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
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