Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
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...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
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I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
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