So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
