Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
