how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
you win again, gameday.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
