hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
